Stalk Keen

Project X…tra Special

jjjonathan — Thu, 11 Mar 2010 08:22:05 +0000

Well we found out today that we’re ending this blogging project in a week. Maybe this means something special is in the working – maybe it doesn’t (Except it does). Stalking as I’ve discovered, takes a dedicated hand. A dedicated hand that I’ve realized I probably don’t have. How can real stalkers keep this up for so long? Don’t they have other things to do..? Well, I guess that’s probably the point, they actually don’t have other things to do. creepy.

Well as this blog comes to an end, I think it’s time to initiate my final project. It’s probably one of the greatest things I will ever do.

What is it?
Is it stalking?
Is it dangerous?

Answer: No/maybe

The outcome on the target is the same as stalking, but doesn’t actually require me to do any laborious work. But how amazing is it? It’s so amazing that I’m surprised I hadn’t attempted it earlier — It will be the start of a new and glorious past-time for everyone. This project will be everything this blog should have been. This project has to be my legacy. It has to be a mystery, a quest, a story. It has to be a legacy.

Vancouver is cool, you should live here

jjjonathan — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 12:08:32 +0000

hurray for reading break. I have gone downtown more times this week than I have probably ever gone in my lifetime. The city has seriously been transformed by the olympics. The venues for free concerts and shows are amazing and watching events on a big screen with a thousand other canadians surrounding you is something to be experienced. It doesn’t matter if it’s a men’s hockey game or women’s curling, when you’re with a crowd of people cheering for the same team every sport becomes the best sport in the world.

Outside of the Olympics, Vancouver is typically a busy city, but it’s everyone busy in their own worlds. The skytrains are usually silent going from destination to destination but now they’re filled with excited chatter and spontaneous break-outs of “Oh Canada” — and even though it’s usually led by drunken fanatics adorning maple leaf capes and singing horribly off key, it’s fantastic. As cheesy as it sounds, there is something utterly and undeniably infectious about the spirit of the olympics. It’s taken years to get to this point but Vancouver has come alive. Strangers are striking up conversations with people they’ve never met before; adults are laughing at jokes teenagers make on busses and trains. I guess the truly exciting news is something that’s so simple and yet so indescribably profound.

People are people in public again.

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and now for some photos of last week’s target. I’ll be honest here, the target’s description was ridiculously…ridiculous. I tried to find guys wearing purple and drinking coffee but i realized that unless I actually staked out coffee shops for hours on end, the task was going to be pretty difficult. Unfortunately, during the olympic festivities, I only managed (or remembered) to find one guy bearing the description. Fortunately I took multiple pictures of him. And by “multiple” I mean three. so here you are: photos of the target and a small sample of the Olympics in Vancouver

Duh

jjjonathan — Tue, 16 Feb 2010 07:42:18 +0000

Umm, the Olympics are kind of happening right here for the next couple of weeks and there is just way too much stuff happening around the city for me to be updating this blog with ridiculously difficult-to-capture photos of guys in purple drinking cofffee. I do have a few photos, but I will be enjoying the festivities and ergo, updates will be slightly postponed.

Goodbye!

This just in

jjjonathan — Wed, 10 Feb 2010 02:29:18 +0000

Okay so the results of this week’s target polls are in and it looks like this week may prove to be very challenging. The votes have been counted and for some odd and/or creepy reason, the overwhelming majority of you would like to see a male wearing purple.

The key feature was a much closer one between an umbrella and coffee but fate has dictated that Coffee will be the key feature distinguishing this week’s target from the cornucopia of Vancouver’s winterless people.

*Stalking Update – I’ve learned that guys DO wear purple AND drink coffee. Yesterday while standing in line at Tim Hortons on campus, I saw a purple-clad student lining up a few places ahead of me. I tried to get a shot off of him but apparently coffee shops are full of people (people who grow suspicious if you have your camera [iPhone] pointed in one person’s direction for too long).
Hey you don’t know what I’m doing..I could be texting or phoning or playing a game for all you know..!

Anyway, here is the semi-failed shot I tried to take. A full collection of this weeks photos to be posted Friday.

Due to popular request

jjjonathan — Sat, 06 Feb 2010 21:52:07 +0000

Okay so pictures of this week’s target are up. If you don’t know what ‘target’ is referring to or are just generally creeped out by this blog then please visit the “About” page. It will hopefully clear things up for you and make you less inclined to not want to talk to me.

Here are the results of this weeks poll:
-Male/female
-wearing white/red/brown
-Key Feature: Boots

Just a precursor to the pictures: I know the poll resulted in both males and females being eligible but through my stalking adventures it became apparent that guys generally don’t wear white/red/brown while simultaneously sporting boots…or maybe it’s just that guys don’t wear boots. In any case, this is my explanation for why I don’t have any pictures of guys. I also realize that since there are only pictures of girls this makes my unsub-factor increase by at least 70% (if you don’t know what that is, go watch Criminal Minds).

EDIT: Wow thank you to everyone for your comments/votes/visits to this blog. This started off as kind of a joke theme for a university english class project I had and I never expected it to extend its reach past the classroom. Perhaps you are all just super classy and intelligent people, in which case I congratulate you — or perhaps you are all just odd and/or sick people, in which case…somebody help me...

Thanks again!

POLL for Feb 6-10

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I’m not dead!

jjjonathan — Tue, 02 Feb 2010 07:17:41 +0000

Okay sorry for the slow update. The voting is done and it looks like there were many ties, which strangely works out in my favour. The person I’m looking for this week is a male/female, wearing red/white/brown, and the clincher: they must be wearing boots.

I’ve been taking pictures this week but I’m finding it harder than I thought it would be. When I see someone who matches the description in public I really only have about 10 seconds to take the shot before they are out of range and/or I have to literally follow them to take the picture. It sounds easy enough but in public it’s not only the person you are taking a picture of that you have to be mindful of, it’s the people BEHIND you who have the ability to SEE that your phone is in camera mode and you’re taking photos of strangers.

I’ve come up with some tricks that probably make me seem less conspicuous

1: Always have earphones plugged into the phone’s audio jack so it looks like you’re listening to music
2: When you are pointing the camera right at someone to take the shot, simultaneously pretend to be adjusting the earphones inside your ear so they really think you’re listening to music.
3: If you are pointing the phone at them and they look at you weird, then immediately put the phone to your ear and say “hello?” and walk away without looking back.

Got any tips on how to be a better stalker? Post them and I’ll tell you if they work or not.

Photos will be up shortly.

Bombs Away!

jjjonathan — Wed, 27 Jan 2010 02:01:49 +0000

Alright here we go.

Thus begins the polling/questioning/commenting. Hopefully.

If you would be so kind as to answer the following things then we’ll be able to get this project underway.

Also for you, a taste of what is to possibly come.

I’ve received some comments that this all seems quite creepy and to a certain extent I probably agree with you and —well…no I admit this almost crosses Criminal Minds Un-Sub creepy…

However! If you use your sociological imagination, by looking at this as “art”, then I think you will all agree that everything becomes slightly less creepy. Emphasis on “slightly”.

View This Poll View This Poll View This Poll View This Poll View This Poll

Please Don’t Sue Me

jjjonathan — Tue, 26 Jan 2010 00:17:11 +0000

Educational. Interactive . and/or slightly illegal.

So I’ve decided to begin a little photo project with the high hopes that it will alter the way we look at what’s going on in the world around us.

Over the next few weeks I’ll be going around campus and the city taking pictures of seemingly random people. I say the word ’seemingly’ because although these people will almost certainly be unknown to me, there will in fact be a reason for me to take their picture.

This is where you guys come in. Similar to what Megan is doing with her “Choose Your Own Adventure” style blog, I’ll be taking pictures of people based on the information YOU give me. I may ask questions in polls to see what you would like me to photograph or I may just rely on character descriptions you leave for me in the comment section.

Why is this a good blog to follow? That’s a pretty intelligent-sounding question you ask. Well it’s because this blog will be…UNPREDICTABLE! <— (Like the CAPS on that last word )

Some weeks I may get 50 pictures of whatever the goal is, some weeks I might not manage to get 1 picture. In any case, I will be out in public taking pictures of complete strangers with my iphone which means that the likelihood of awkward and/or embarrassing moments ensuing will be (hilariously) high—Which ultimately means it will almost certainly be entertaining for you.

I am now in danger. For you.